God-Awful Crocs

These days, conversations with Hayes usually go one of two ways; either he responds to whatever I say with a defiant "No, Mommy!" Or else whatever I say ends up being translated into three-year-old-jargon and repeated to someone who was never a part of our original conversation. Thankfully, this usually happens with the people that Hayes and I know and love and speak to everyday. But every now and then, it involves a total stranger who, no doubt, walks away from the encounter thinking I'm a jerk.

The last time this happened was after a conversation Hayes and I had about how he was not getting a pair of those God-awful Croc shoes. You know, the plastic shoes every single child and their mother on the playground has. I understand the functional factor here but, they can really ruin a good look.

Recently, a pair that a little boy wore to the park caught Hayes's attention. He got very excited and ran directly over to the boy whose mother was also standing nearby. Hayes pointed to the little boy's Crocs and said, "See Mommy, they're not ugly." This presented a slightly awkward moment that I cleverly smoothed over with a quick lie, "No, the camouflage pair isn't ugly, my love." But, of course, Hayes took the opportunity to beg me for a pair right on the spot, creating a slightly more awkward moment. That's when the little boy's mother attempted to convince me of the amazing shoe investment that a pair of Crocs is. They're comfortable, the kids can put them on in mere seconds all by themselves, blah, blah, blah. She had me confused with someone who cares more about function than form. I felt the need to make myself clear. So I launched into a brief explanation about how the smaller sizes can be kind of cute, but the overall design is so unattractive that they just become unwearable. Since she had nothing to say after that, I was pretty happy with how I diplomatically countered her assumptions of me. That is, until I walked away and noticed that she was also wearing a pair of those God-awful Crocs too. Yikes!